The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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