Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize
