there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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