So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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