So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
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