So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Drunk is not a location!
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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