you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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