ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
