i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
