i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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