he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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