Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(716): View more from New York

honey bunches of taint.

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.

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(631): View more from New York

You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.

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(415): View more from California

sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.

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(518): View more from New York

Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.

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(413): View more from Massachusetts

Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations

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(453): View more from

You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”

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