it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
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