She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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