I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize