Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize