i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
