I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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