there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I'm at about main and main street
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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