You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
