If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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