i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
