Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
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