I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
