yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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