Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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