fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Randomize