You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Randomize
