my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
