Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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