What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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