Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
