she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
