i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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