She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
