Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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