you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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