One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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