idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Randomize
