dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize