we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
