Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
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