So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
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