only if we run a train.
done.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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