Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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