Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
