thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Watching her eat just hurts me
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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