I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
