That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
