I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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